Oh My! Monday: Make them feel loved
I know majority of my readers are parents but for those of you who aren’t, this article is still for you.
Think, how long have you been in a relationship? Not just the married years but from day 1 of meeting your SO. What was it that first caught your eye to them? Did either of you play hard to get or was it just like a magnet to the fridge attraction? How soon did you feel the sparks?
Now jump ahead to now. What is it that causes you to still be so in love after all of this time? Is it the way they laugh at your cheesy jokes? The fact that they still flirt with you? Do you ever just look at them and smile for nothing? Have you started to appreciate their obnoxious habits?
In every relationship, there comes a time where we think we’re about to break and contemplate the end of it. Work, money, having kids, family events, a multitude of things can create this. Here is the thing though, true love will bring you back from that and remind you of the good. We all fight. If you say you’ve never fought with your SO, then you’re not in an honest relationship. There are a lot of things that can make you fight and the worst part of fighting… we start to feel like we aren’t loved like they used to.
I know I have been there a few times and I know that I have made him feel that way. I hate it. When I feel that way, I make myself sick. I question everything about myself from my physical appearance to my personality, the things I do and the things I don’t do. I start questioning him and if fidelity will ever become an issue for either of us.
My parents have been great role models for me about how to handle everything that comes up in a relationship. I can talk to them about anything I know, just choose not to ask them on things pertaining to our sex life (for obvious awkward reasons). But here is the thing, if you don’t feel like your partner is sexually attracted to you it will affect how you act everyday. It is a blow to your confidence. You are less affectionate and start to say I love you less. When we’re fighting, I don’t want to be near him let alone sleep next to him snoring.
You need to show your SO that you love them. Show them that they are important to you. My parents still gross me out with how much they love each other. They kiss and cuddle up in their giant bean bag while watching their shows. Go, pat her butt when she walks past. Whistle when he bends over and gets a plumbers crack. Don’t ever let them begin to think that you don’t feel like you used to. I show Jake by meeting him at the door when he gets home with a kiss. When I walk past him I will kiss his forehead. I do little things that I think make him happy. One of the biggest reasons people cheat is their needs aren’t being met at home. It starts with emotions and can lead to sex. Never let that happen.
Go on a date. Rent a movie. Cook dinner together. Play a card game. Find something that you can do together and start from there.
Remember, someone loves you.